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cartoon pimp Hey Kiddies!
I'm Doogey Dog Pepe ! You can be pimp just like me ! All you have to do is listen to rap, wear some mad bling bling, put your cap to the side and walk like you've got something shoved up your butt!


albino pimp The Truth About Dreds
Dreds are really worn because they act as "handles" when a dominant gang member is testing your loyalty with an act of love. This specimen (to ensure he is selected), has also fashioned himself a nose hook that he can be led around by. When he (or she - we aren't sure with this pic) isn't abusing a hole puncher and shoving iron through his skin - this wigga is practicing kneeling (and he ain't religious - get our drift?).

cart pimp Gangsta Room Service
Don't be fooled by the peace flashin', you are witnessing the setup of a gang hit at the suburbia Hilton™. After "G-Shuggy" was dissed at the prom by his rival "Method Killah" the room got silent and the tension was so thick you could stab it with a shank! G-Shuggy chocked and couldn't drop no bombs - now his ego demands reperations! Contract hits are common in the suburbs and our investigative camera is capturing a soldier about to do the dirty work. When Method Killah orders cookies and milk for himself and his shorty, it will be the last snack they ever have.

sleepy pimp Sleepy Wigga
This pimp is breaking the most important rule of dealin - don't get high on your own ganja. Walking around the side of the trailer, this O.G is showing off his cracker jack box bling and advertising to the trailer park how pimp he is by being a walking billboard for douchebags everywhere. If this won't get the honeyz, nothing will.

south pole pimp Frigid Explorer
The common held belief that Roald Engelbregt Gravning Amundsen was the first to reach the south pole may not be accurate! This wigga is claiming the south pole for himself - and it's authentic as the shirt says (never mind the 82,627 regs before)! This will give our boy insane street cred and help him land the gang position he's always wanted - territory scout.

Staff Note: We tried to hold back on this one, we really did but couldn't help noticing that if you slap a point on the Southern Hemisphere onto a piece of cloth, put the word "Authentic" on it, and then some arbitrary number some exectutive pulled out of his ass - you've got yoruself a hot selling t-shirt that any suburbia pimp will buy.